The politics of perception is a funny thing. Pass a $780 billion economic bill and a migratory flock of pundits proclaim the failure of bipartisanship. But the New Yorker’s Hedrick Hertzberg sees a metagame silver-lining (well, that, and passing the damn bill):

Fifty years ago, the civil-rights movement understood that nonviolence can be an effective weapon even if—or especially if—the other side refuses to follow suit. Obama has a similarly tough-minded understanding of the political uses of bipartisanship, which, even if it fails as a tactic for compromise, can succeed as a tonal strategy: once the other side makes itself appear intransigently, destructively partisan, the game is half won. Obama is learning to throw the ball harder. But it’s not Rovian hardball he’s playing. More like Gandhian hardball.

Gandhi, of course, played only hardball, and played only to win. He understood better than anyone that the battle of perception had to be waged at the nexus of the enemy’s hypocrisy and conscience. Finding that nexus is the tricky part.

Ever want to really get away from it all? Well if you believe the folks at lunarland.com (a.k.a. the Lunar Embassy), for the low low price of $29.95, you can have your very own acre of moon.

Transportation to your starside getaway is sadly not included.

But, the astute reader may ask, does the Lunar Embassy actually own the moon? Lunarland proclaims:

BEWARE of other ‘Lunar’ companies selling Moon property. They might seem legitimate but the Lunar Embassy is THE ONLY COMPANY in the world to possess a legal basis and copyright for the sale of Lunar and other extraterrestrial property within the confines of our solar system since the year 1980. You could be purchasing a worthless piece of paper if you are not purchasing Lunar land from an authorized Lunar Embassy agent.

The legal basis? According to the lunarland general FAQ, “The 1967 UN Outer Space Treaty stipulates that no government can own extraterrestrial property, but it neglected to mention individuals or corporations. In 1984, the UN attempted to plug this loophole (which they where very aware of), by introducing the ill-fated Moon Treaty … [but] out of 185 UN Member Nations, only six supported it.”

From this loophole comes a truly dizzying piece of legal logic: “Therefore, one can become the legal owner of an extraterrestrial body, if you are the first one that claimed it, and that being the Lunar Embassy.” Just like calling “Shotgun” before getting into your friend’s car.

But, you may ask, how would one go about claiming the moon? Turns out you don’t even have to travel that far: “In 1980, Dennis Hope [the "Big Cheese" of the Lunar Embassy], went to his local US Governmental Office for claim registries, the San Francisco County Seat. He made a claim for the entire lunar surface, as well as the surface of all the other eight planets of our solar system and their moons (except Earth and the sun). Obviously, he was at first taken for a crackpot. Then after 3 supervisors and 5 hours later, the main supervisor accepted, and registered his claim.”

The good news is that Lunar Embassy will sell you the land, complete with Lunar Deed, Lunar Map, Lunar Constitution and Bill of Rights, and even Mineral Rights. For $99.95 you can even buy the Super Delux Valentine’s Package, which naturally comes with a teddy bear and box of chocolates.

For those of you with larger territorial ambitions, the Lunar Embassy is happy to sell you blocks, Lunar Cities, and even a Quandrant (888,790 acres for just $1,155,427.00 US dollars).

The Lunar Embassy does admit that it can’t guarantee your property rights, and that its products are, in fact, a “novel gift” because its legal teams advises that “Classifying the property as a novel gift, helps to avoid any frivolous lawsuits from a foreign country.” Indeed.

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The coda to this romp is that beyond such novelties, there are in fact more serious attempts to develop a legal framework for private property on moon and beyond. See Space Bubble Real Estate from the N.Y. Times Freakonomics blog, and Space settlements, property rights, and international law: Could a lunar settlement claim the lunar real estate it needs to survive?, from the Journal of Air Law and Commerce by Alan Wasser and Douglas Jobes.

And despite the Lunar Embassy’s somewhat dubious title claims, University of Tennessee Law Professor Reynolds ponders in The Case for Lunar Property Rights that Hope’s “customers have created a constituency to recognize his position. If he sells enough lunar property, it may become a self-fulfilling prophecy.” Hope says that over the last 28 years he’s sold over 300 million acres to “millions of customers” including two former U.S. Presidents. Now if only he could solve that pesky transportation issue.

C-3PO: Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1.
Han Solo: Never tell me the odds.

Photo courtesy Balakov, via creative commons license.

Divorce is so prevalent nowadays that getting married at all sometimes seems like successfully navigating an asteroid field. So how do you know if your True Love will stand the test of time? Well you’re in luck, because divorce360.com has put together a handy dandy Kreskin-like marriage calculator to tell you the precise odds that you will get divorced. It’s absolutely, positively better than a magic eight ball.

And what if you want to know whether it’s worth it to get married at all? Modern Science has seen this to this too, with an online calculator to tell you the financial consequences of getting married (that is, if you make less than $40k a year).

Wish you could take this vital information with you when you’re out and about?  Well, of course there’s an IPhone app for that too.

For those who have no desire to get married, you may still get stuck going to weddings, and the inevitable gift expectations that follow. But how much should you give? Forget Dear Abby. Just visit the Wedding Gift Calculator from ihateweddings.com.

Perusing the hinterlands of the US Copyright office yields a wealth of useful information:

Wanna protect that killer jambalaya recipe? Just add a dollop of “substantial literary expression” and go to FL 122.  Be careful, though; “if you have secret ingredients to a recipe that you do not wish to be revealed, you should not submit your recipe for registration, because applications and deposit copies are public records.”

Copyright your rock band name? Sorry, but band names can only be trademarked.

What about your Elvis sighting? “Copyright law does not protect sightings. However, copyright law will protect your photo (or other depiction) of your sighting of Elvis.” Just send your $35 to register your very own special Elvis.

All this and more, such as what to do about that diary you found in your grandmother’s attic and that distant star that was named after you, can be found at the FAQ.

Remember to keep life in perspective and to remember the good things even in the face of troubles. We think our little video will help you out in this regard. [Read more →]